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Time is limited, especially for a middle-aged woman, Lily realized. Years before embarking on Craigslist, both of us had experienced sexual abandonment. Luke, who restored her faith in romantic love; and Carl, who made her want to change her phone number, pull the covers over her head, and never go on another date again. And we share the real list of what we've learned:

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Menage a Trois Despite the languid, Henry-and-June, Paris-in-the-rain romanticism that surrounds the menage-a-trois fantasy, Anna had to type e-mails for months to try to set one up. Finally, there's the zany sitcom a woman's life becomes when she's juggling multiple lovers: Our adventures have included the hot, the not-so-hot, and some potential hook-ups that never even got off the ground. She answered one ad from a couple based in Oregon and met them face-to-face at Peet's on Fourth Street.

A younger guy is not a get-out-of-jail-free card. It's tough to find time to have sex when you're writing about it. She found that one person was usually much more into the idea of a three-way than their partner.

Kevin was quite handsome and aloof. There are enterprising escorts, cyber-bots, and pay-to-view porn scams galore that spam male posters. You are so relaxed," Lily told him. Can a man belt-notch and think he's "sowing his wild oats," but when a woman does the same thing, she exposes herself to being called a slut? There is an endless variety of enticing, amusing, and erotic messages. While they connected intellectually, Mr. After the break-up, Lily was getting closer to knowing what she didn't want. He gave great e-mail. Among the dates that never went all the way: